Saint Velma
Dear The Pope or Current Resident, Concerning the Canonization of Velma Evans, I wasn’t the only one to call Velma Evans “grandma”. Though she was, in fact, my actual grandma—on my mom’s side.On Sunday mornings after church, when we were old enough, and while my parents loitered around to socialize with the other adults, we would walk down to her house. And when I say “we” I mean a variety of we’s. At first, “we” meant me and my older cousin Jamie. Then, “we” added my brother Kyle. Then “we” became our friends Andrew and Michael. Then it became all my brothers, and our friends. At various times, “we” included exchange students, orphan neighbor kids, and an occasional stranger. This continued through college and on into adulthood. But on any given Sunday—rain, snow, or shine—a veritable parade of juveniles could be seen jamming down to grandma’s house immediately after the last “amen.” Grandma lived a few blocks away, in a single-story brick duplex with my grandpa Hayes. They lived in